so watch me fly

Jan 20

I haven’t posted in a long time.  I know everyone wants to know how I’m dealing with Carl and really truth is, I’m not. I’m not thinking about it.  I haven’t cried for him.  I don’t know how.

It doesn’t feel real and I don’t know how to grieve when I can’t believe he’s really dead.  No one asks me to my face, so I don’t tell anyone.  It’s just easier.  It’s safer.

I’ve got a baby brother coming.  My mum needs me.  I have to be strong for them.  Maybe when he’s here, I can cry for Carl.  Maybe then, but not now, because if I start crying now I don’t think I’ll stop and I don’t think Carl would want that.

Dec 12

Anonymous asked: Maybe one day you will. But it's funny. You won't associate it back to this message. You'll just assume that I'm a stranger or an old friend or someone who gives you a funny tasting drink.

Stop it.

Anonymous asked: Rapunzel. Yes. I understood that reference. Anyway. Come on, baby. Tell me your deepest, darkest secret. Let it out, baby. I'm here for you. I'm always here... like the darkness under your bed. Mysterious. Waiting for your foot to touch the ground so I can snatch at it. I love you so, baby. I love you.

That’s not funny.  I don’t know who you are.

Anonymous asked: But I can be /very/ interesting, Lydia. You have beautiful blond hair.

It’s not magical…  So don’t get any ideas.

Anonymous asked: You're very beautiful and I wouldn't mind sinking my teeth into you.

That would hurt.  Obscene anons aren’t really interesting you know….

Two questions and that’s it?  Boo.

Anonymous asked: ever been fucked?

No and that’s vulgar :c

Anonymous asked: Do you miss me?

I don’t know who you are.

↖ is now accepting curious anons.

(via carlandthepowers)

Nov 09

Anonymous asked: I know I don't really know you, but I just wanted to say, good job for keeping your head up and not giving in to hate. :) -Beatrice

Awwww, thank you!  You’re sweet, Beatrice!  c:  And I LOVE the painting you posted!